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The idea of guys crossing from “Just Friends” to “Boyfriend” is almost exclusively the domain of bad romantic comedies. In the former, you’ve been given a more socially acceptable “thanks but no thanks” from someone who isn’t interested in you. well, you’re not really in the Friend Zone because you’re not really their friend. If you’ve found yourself in this zone, then the odds are good that you haven’t been friends for terribly long; weeks rather than months or months rather than years.People who have actually made the leap are like the Loch Ness Monster – everybody’s heard of it, almost nobody’s seen it and everyone’s pretty sure the people who say they The fact of the matter is, I was one of those people who would willingly put himself into The Friend Zone because I was too chicken to make a move and would rather rely on the Platonic Friend Back Door Gambit to try to weasel my way in rather than risk rejection and make a move. I’ve detailed the various forms that The Friend Zone takes, from the LJBF polite rejection to the genuine friendship, and it’s critical to know where you stand. You have far less emotional inertia to overcome and her((For the sake of convenience, I’m going to be using the feminine pronoun – the Friend Zone is predominately something that guys inflict on themselves- but my advice applies equally for men and women.)) mental image of you is going to be considerably less entrenched than if the two of you have been friends for years.I was out of line with their pre-conceived idea of who I was and what I looked like that they were forced to re-consider who I was and how we related to each other.

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The problem is that it can be hard to pierce the filter of our pre-concieved notions about our friends; we have built up these images in our heads, a sort of mental short-hand that stands in for the real thing.

You need to give her cause to re-define who you are to her – and that means it’s time to make some changes and shake up the status quo.

Better fitting clothes and a new, more flattering hairstyle can work wonders.

Improving your body language and posture by adopting more confident attitudes can make you seem like a new person. If you have facial hair, shave it off or adopt a style that works better with your face – not every style works well for every sort of face.

I was standing straight, with my shoulders back and my arms held loose at my sides.

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